


Team

by joahdun



Category: Aquaman (2018), Batman - All Media Types, Justice League - All Media Types, The Flash - All Media Types, Wonder Woman - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Insecurity, Team Bonding
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-21
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2019-06-13 21:32:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15373761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joahdun/pseuds/joahdun
Summary: A series of one shots





	Team

**Author's Note:**

> have i watched four seasons of flash, half the wonder woman movie, supergirl, and both the dark night rises and declared that that's enough? absolutely. 
> 
>  
> 
> enjoy my one am trash post =)

If there was one thing Barry Allen had taken away from every person he had ever been around, it was that everything people did were motivated by two things. 

Fear, and love. 

As long as he could remember, he had always been afraid. 

One of the earliest moments of terror that he could remember was when he was five, and his mother had swerved off the icy road. If he closed his eyes, he could still picture how his heart nearly beat out of his chest as they lost control of the car, the dread that they would crash into something filled his whole body to the point that he could barely breath. 

Another time he was afraid was when he was nine, his father hauled off to prison for murdering his wife, Barry's mother, and he felt the overwhelming fear again as he wondering what these people were going to do to his only family, and what would happen to his once secure life. 

Occurrences like this predominated his life, bleeding into more and more normal situations of his life until he was lying in his bed, crying, frustrated, as he lost another friend to his obsessive analyzing, trying to figure out the one thing he never could- the human mind.

Then, life happened, Things changed. He got super speed, and for once in his life, he felt powerful. His control took over his fear, and instead of freezing up, he ran head first into dangerous situations that his old self would have fainted at the prospect of. 

People began to respect him, hail him as a hero, even. 

He felt more like himself than he had ever felt as Barry Allen, so he became the Flash, a superhero.

It all changed the first time he lost someone. 

Crushed under the burning embers of a fallen building as he choked on the thick billows of smoke, unable to protect them the way that had expected him to. 

Overcome by guilt and shame, he had retreated back into his old shell, the Barry he had pushed down coming back full force when he realized that no matter who he was, he would never be in control. 

He couldn't escape his failure, his face flashing on every television screen he looked at as the people wondered what had happened to their oh so great hero. 

Over time, he had accepted that it happened to everyone, and had stepped into his old suit with a new resolve to never let what happened to that woman happen to anyone else. 

But of course, he failed at that too.

His second loss turned into the third, then fourth and with each fallen body and risen number he felt the crushing sense of failure and guilt fall on his shoulders again, increasing by tenfold every time he wasn't fast enough, or smart enough. 

Things span out of control, and Barry had had enough. So he did what he did best. 

Hide. 

Things were going fine, or at least as fine as they could be, for a long while, until a strange man ended up in his house, asking him questions about his super suit. He dodged the questions, familiar regret building up in his throat as he thought of his short lived career as a superhero. 

Turns out the guy was Batman, and he needed Barry's help to save the world. He felt a spark of hope light up in his chest, one that was quickly diminished as the great hero informed him that he was a last resort, and that he had barely anyone on the team. 

To make things worse, more company in the form of legendary superheroes joined their team, and after they disregarded him as an idiot, he had felt so small.

Inadequate. 

He pondered this one night as he nursed his sore head, running the recent events in his head as things started to settle. He remembered getting pummeled into the wall by Steppenwolf, and how nobody had even bothered to check if he was okay, all attention gone towards Superman and Wonder Woman. 

It shouldn't have bothered him. He was growing to expect it. 

It still hurt.


End file.
